At the end of the People’s Dalliance with Democracy rally last Sunday, a Thai People’s Declaration to the World was read out and is available in Thai, Cambodian and English on the Manager website. Like all such declarations, it went through a few drafts before emerging in its current form.

Prachatai has been fortunate enough to come into possession of what appears to be a page from an earlier version, together with a number of handwritten comments and emendations. There is no indication as to who is responsible for either the draft or the comments but there seems little reason to doubt the document’s total lack of authenticity. The piece of paper was obtained, as always, from a highly impeachable source, and is available for inspection at the Prachatai office for a limited period until the waste paper bins are emptied.

This important historical text shows the remarkable progress that the PAD has made in projecting an image to the world which is quite unlike the jingoistic, incendiary and bloodthirsty claptrap that it dishes out to its Thai followers. However, readers are invited to view the script and form their own judgement.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

[Draft]
5. We declare that the people of Kingdom of Thailand and the vulgar people of the Kingdom of Cambodia remain friendly neighbours.

[Comment]
We’ll let Gen Preecha Iamsuphan use the ‘vulgar’ bit in his speech. How about ‘the poverty-stricken beggars of the Kingdom of Cambodia’?

[Further comment]
OK, but ‘people’ and ‘beggars’ don’t balance. Why not let one of the warm-up speakers call the Cambodians poor? Saken, maybe. We can work in the beggars thing there as well.

[Amended version]
5. We declare that the Kingdom of Thailand and the Kingdom of Cambodia and its peoples remain friendly neighbours.

[Draft]
We, therefore, call upon non-human Hun Sen to cease his activities in conspiring against Thailand or we will close all 40 Thai-Cambodian border checkpoints, ban all flights to Cambodia from Bangkok, build a naval base at Koh Kut, deploy battleships, abolish the committee which oversees demarcation of overlapping sea areas, and officially declare our own marine map, and we could not care less what the Cambodians think because Cambodia would not have the nerve to fight us.

[Comment]
What’s with all these threats? Where do they come from?

[Further comment]
It’s just a rewrite of what Dear Leader SL said last July when we were ramping up the Preah Vihear rhetoric. Has our policy changed on this?

[Further comment]
No, but that was for a Thai audience. Maybe we should tone it down a bit for international circulation. And lose the ‘non-human’. We can let the students or artists or somebody use that line on the night instead.

[Further comment]
It’s not just Hun Sen, it’s also Despicable Criminal Devil Incarnate Thaksin Shinawatra as well.

[Further comment]
Good point. But for the purposes of this declaration only, we’re just calling him ‘Fugitive Thaksin Shinawatra’. A bit wimpish, I know, but the word from our Dear 5 Leaders is that what works for our lot won’t sway international public opinion. All part of the compromise of becoming a proper political party, I suppose.

[Amended version]
We, therefore, call upon Mr. Hun Sen to cease his activities in conspiring with Fugitive Thaksin Shinawatra in turning Thailand into an enemy of Cambodia.

[Draft]
6. Following in our ancestors footsteps, we, the people of Thailand, continue to be at peace with our neighbours and the world.

[Comment]
Whose ancestors? Half our lot walk round with t-shirts saying they’re Chinese. And aren’t we going to be singing all about the wars with the Burmese and that? What tradition of ‘peace with our neighbours’?

[Further comment]
Foreigners won’t know anything about Thai history. Even less than the average Thai. We can get away with this, so let it stand.

[Draft]
We are dedicated to cooperating with the peoples and governments of nations around the world in protecting world peace, human rights, and the wellbeing of mankind.

[Comment]
If they can swallow that they can swallow anything. Leave it in.

About author: Bangkokians with long memories may remember his irreverent column in The Nation in the 1980's. During his period of enforced silence since then, he was variously reported as participating in a 999-day meditation retreat in a hill-top monastery in Mae Hong Son (he gave up after 998 days), as the Special Rapporteur for Satire of the UN High Commission for Human Rights, and as understudy for the male lead in the long-running ‘Pussies -not the Musical' at the Neasden International Palladium (formerly Park Lane Empire).